Some Things I Learned in High School

Under oath I will disavow any participation in any of the following lessons learned in high school, especially if they seem inappropriate in any way. I will only admit to "hearing" about them. :)

1. I don't know about now, but in the fall of 1966, if you mouthed off to an upper classman, your pants will go up the flagpole.

2. A shotgun shell, with the shot removed and clamped tightly into a vice in Industrial Arts, and then hit on the firing cap with a screwdriver and hammer, will create a noise sufficiently loud enough to be heard in the principal’s office.

3. Being so bored in Study Hall that you and a friend decide to write a note to one of the girls explaining to her everything you learned in health that day, will get you called out of your next class after the office compares the note to samples of your handwriting.

4. Viewing the tests the military recruiters gave as a day out of class and nothing really important will result in test scores so low the only jobs you will qualify for after you enlist have tools limited to a rake, a shovel and a horse stall.

5. Cellophane, when stretched tightly across a toilet bowl, will go unnoticed by most guys... until it's too late.

6. Trying to pull a prank (with notes in Study Hall again), by writing one note to a guy and another note to a girl, and then telling them that the notes are from each other, will actually end up with them dating for awhile. So much for pranks. This actually happened. The pranksters turned into match makers. :)

7. Chewing gum does not hide or mask the smell of beer on a 15 year old’s breath.

8. Carrying a girl’s books to class almost every day the first half of freshman year doesn’t mean diddly if another guy is walking the girl to class.

9. Smoking in the boy’s rest room is not smoking outside just because you have the window open. And they also will not take bad weather as an excuse.

10. Going to a meeting to determine if there is interest in starting a track team with a reputation for being involved in some of the items listed above will only cause the coach to start the meeting with a remark like, “How many of you are interested in starting up a track team, and how many of you are like *******, and are just here to get out of class?”